Can food turn you on?

For my and my boyfriend’s first Valentine’s Day together, I desperately searched for sexy food on my phone hoping the perfect dish would appear. I wanted the dish to say: “I’m twenty years old, ready to shag, I love you.” I felt pasta would make us lethargic and sluggish rather than nimble and virile, but if I made him a salad, that’s basically the same thing as telling him I hate his guts. He doesn’t like goat’s cheese, I don’t eat meat. I could feel my face get hot, my breathing grow shallow, my heart rate speed up… no it was not a lovely sexual encounter but a low-level panic attack over how to convey how sexy and attractive I was through food. 

I’m not the only person who prefers to seduce men through their stomachs. The idea of an “aphrodisiac” e.g. a food or substance that can heighten your libido and/or sexual pleasure, dates all the way back to the middle ages when visual symbolism played an important role in medicine. The cure needed to represent the ailment, so asparagus, oysters, sea cucumbers and ginseng were seen as cures for sexual problems due to their shape or texture. It’s nice to know that centuries later, we still associate different foods with genitalia. In 2011, people started to use the eggplant and peach emoji to represent, well… you know. But visual symbolism is not the only type of aphrodisiac. Chocolate has also long been associated with sexual desire, Aztec Emperor Moctezuma II is said to have drunk up to fifty goblets of hot chocolate before visiting his harem. The effect of food on sex was seen as highly potent in the middle ages, so much so that herbs like basil, mint and cinnamon were banned in Europe in the middle ages because they were the common ingredients of love potions. 

Although the idea that eating certain foods can enhance your sexual experiences remains popular, what does science have to say? For people with low blood flow, foods such as berries, red wine and chocolate can act almost like viagra by stimulating blood flow in the genital area. However, for people with normal blood flow there is not going to be any physical effect. In fact, a recent study found that women who eat more chocolate are less interested in sex. Researchers hypothesised that eating chocolate might act as a substitute for sex by stimulating the production of neurotransmitters serotonin and dopamine, which both also play a role in our sexual responses. To be fair, in my experience, a chocolate bar has a 100% success rate in making my day… sex with a college student? Not nearly the same guarantee. According to science, there is only one proven aphrodisiac; alcohol. I have no doubt everyone can attest to this fact. Another under-researched aphrodisiac is marijuana. According to the Journal of Sexual Medicine, people who smoke weed have more sex, and many weed smokers are quick to say that it is indeed “the love drug”. A quick survey of my pot-smoking friends led to a shocking discovery, every single one of them told me that they had better sex after consuming a small amount of weed. But I’m not the only one who’s figured this out. Dr Jordan Tishler, a faculty member at Harvard Medical School, has incorporated cannabis into his sexual health practice. 

People mostly agree though that whilst certain substances can have aphrodisiac qualities, it is mostly psychological. In an essay for Vittles magazine, Jo Hamya wrote about the sexual nature of eating in bed with her partner: “A dinner table has formalities a bed does not. It gives us pleasure to eat in bed. A pleasure to be with, to dine with, those you love there.” I agree with her, eating and having sex have two important things in common; they involve pleasure and intimacy. I would even go so far as to argue that although you might have sex with someone you don’t know very well, it’s unlikely that you’d share a meal with them in bed. It requires a non-judgmental desire for the other person to feel good (even if they don’t look particularly good). The sexiest thing you can do for someone is show them that you want them to feel good. This is why getting flowers and chocolates are such a turn on. Flowers are soft, sensual, they smell good. Chocolate melts in your mouth, sweet and sticky. These things have a profoundly physical effect on people. Sad, stressed out people are generally not being too adventurous in bed. So, if you can provide a moment of peace or sensuality for your partner, it’s likely that your sex will get better too. 

Nice meals, chocolates, red wine and flowers are not just for Valentine’s Day. Surprising your partner with little luxuries is a great way to remind them that you’re thinking of them, and that you find them really attractive. Think about what getting your partner a coffee when they’re studying symbolises versus running them a bath and pouring them a glass of red wine. Some gestures can be really sweet and thoughtful without necessarily being sexy. So if you want to add a sexual element to your surprise focus on how the treat will feel physically – does it smell good? Is it decadent? Is it something that they don’t have often? Personally, I am a big fan of baking a rich chocolate cake for absolutely no reason and surprising my boyfriend with a slice. He prefers to pick up a really nice candle and have it lighting when I get home from college. Either way, we know what we’re doing… if you know what I mean.

Chef Jason Wrobel said: “When you make food for someone, that is a primal act of loving them.” Anything can be an aphrodisiac if it is made with the intention of showing someone that you want to jump their bones. This Valentine’s Day, I am making my boyfriend a lasagne, a cheesy, messy, gooey lasagne and we will eat it in bed together. Sitting cross legged across from each other, a bottle of red wine balanced precariously against a pillow. The meal doesn’t have to say anything, its job is to provide satisfaction, pleasure and intimacy.